Another Day, Another Ham Bribe

April 17, 2009


2 Responses to “Another Day, Another Ham Bribe”

  1. Tony G Says:

    I thought you kept Kosher a la Leviticus and couldn’t eat ham. Are you encouraging others to eat ham, while you sit idly by. That’s like taking a [catamite] to a Cher concert and saying “Now surround yourself with temptations and resist!” What if Harvey prefers to follow Leviticus’s rules, too? I think the reason you haven’t been given an award is because you have caused offense upon Harvey. You must make up for it by eating said hams, then offering baked turkeys to Harvey for every day plus for every day you gave him a ham.

  2. liberexmachina Says:

    While I do try to follow the Levitical dietary portion of the Law, it is not a sin to not follow them (see Peter and the Animal Sheet in Book of Acts). I have also yet to meet any Christian who views breaking the Levitical dietary portion of the Law as a sin; as I understand the theology of the Messianic Jews, who get the closest to that position, they view the letter of the Law as a nice thing to voluntarily follow (any Messianic Jews reading, feel free to correct me). Until I meet someone who actually sees ham consumption as a stumbling block, I assume my digital ham bribes are harmless.

    And anyhoo, it is a moot point, for Harvey is the token heathen on IMAO (assuming, of course, that the line from the “IMAOU” podcast was not a public confession of faith; any Harvey from IMAO reading this, feel free to correct me). He also enjoys the succulent taste of bacon (assuming, of course, that line of their podcast where the IMAO gang travels though the Earth’s core was not a sick, sick joke), so I assume he is okay with ham.

    Finally, just because Oprah ravenously devours any ham bribe/gift/appeasement offered to her does not necessarily mean that Harvey (or any sane person for that matter) would do the same with a digital version thereof. There are other uses for baked hams, including, but not limited to: their aesthetic value, animal feed, offensive weapons, cheap incense, chewing gum flavoring.

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